Hope you're hungry. We're about to serve up a bountiful harvest of 50 Thanksgiving puns that'll leave everyone from Grandma to the kids grinning. Or groaning. It all depends on how you feel about puns. There's no shortage of wordplay on the table here. We've got puns about turkeys, cranberry jokes that'll have you relishing the moment, and even some pie puns that are truly the cherry, er, pumpkin on top.
Whether you're tasked with carving the turkey or crafting the perfect Instagram caption, these puns will help you get the holiday started off right. And even if you don't like puns, or you think they're kind of silly, we'll still try and make you giggle. In fact, we bet you won't be able to keep a straight face throughout the entire list. Go on, just try it. The power of puns is too strong. (And if you reach the end of this collection and still haven't cracked so much as a smirk, we've got other options to help you entertain guests, from Thanksgiving quotes to Thanksgiving trivia to Thanksgiving jokes).
These are good puns, though. Nothing too cringe-worthy here. They're all family-friendly as well, so even the kids can get in on cracking jokes. Or drive you wild by repeating the same ones over and over. There's nothing lewd or crude here. Just fun, wholesome jokes that you can commit to memory and pretend you came up with first. No one's going to tell on you. We've got your back.
With this pun-tastic list at your disposal, you'll have everyone giggling in delight this year or groaning in disgust. Either way, you'll all be together. And that's what matters, right?
Thanksgiving Turkey Puns
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- What did the turkey say to the computer? "Google, google!"
- Why did the turkey join the band? Because it had drumsticks!
- Why did the turkey get a timeout? It was using "fowl" language!
- What do you call a turkey that's got rhythm? A drum-bird!
- Why did the turkey refuse dessert? It was already stuffed!
- What did the knife say to the turkey? "Looks like it's carving time!"
- Why did the turkey get kicked off the plane? It was a flight risk!
- Why did the turkey get lost before Thanksgiving? It forgot to "wing" it!
- What's a turkey's favorite song? "All About That Baste."
- What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo? "A turkey that can pluck itself!"
- Is that your pop-up timer or are you just happy to see me?
- What sound does a turkey's phone make? Wing-wing-wing.
- What kind of turkey requires ID? Wild Turkey.
- What happened to the turkey that got in a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him!
- What's a turkey's favorite month? They don't have one, but they prefer any other than November!
- Why did the turkey stand on stilts? Because nobody eats flamingoes for Thanksgiving dinner.
- What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day? Quack, Quack!
- What key has legs and can't open a door? A tur-key.
- Why did the turkey bring a microphone? He was ready to roast.
- Why shouldn't you sit next to a turkey at dinner? Because he will gobble it up.
- What did the turkey say to his real estate agent? Turn-key only.
- What did the turkey say when he met the president? Pardon me.
- What do you call a turkey the day after Thanksgiving? Lucky!
- What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day? Quack, Quack!
- What do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede? Drumsticks for everyone!
- What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day? Quack, Quack!
- Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had his own drumsticks.
- What do you call a running turkey? Fast food.
- What did the farmer have to separate the chicken and the turkey? He sensed fowl play.
- What did the turkey say to his real estate agent? Turn-key only.
- What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day? Quack, Quack!
- What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day? Quack, Quack!
- What do you get if you cross a turkey with a ghost? A poultry-geist.
- What's blue and covered in feathers? A turkey holding its breath.
- Which side of a turkey has more feathers? The outside.
Thanksgiving Food Puns
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- What's a pumpkin's favorite sport? "Squash!"
- What's a potato's motto? "I yam what I yam."
- Why did the cranberries turn red? "Because they saw the turkey dressing!"
- What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner? "The tur-key!"
- Why did the pie go to therapy? "It kept crumbling under pressure."
- What's a pie's favorite movie? "Life of Pi."
- What did one slice of pie say to the other? "You crack me up."
- What's a pumpkin pie's favorite number? "3.14159...because it's a Pi!"
- Why did the rolls get kicked out of school? "Because they were always buttering up the teachers."
- Why did the rolls become motivational speakers? "Because they were so uplifting."
- Why did the potatoes miss the flight? "The plane was "mashed" in traffic!"
- Why did the green bean get kicked out of the Thanksgiving feast? "Because it kept stringing everyone along!"
- What do you get if you divide a pumpkin's circumference by its diameter? "Pumpkin pi."
- Why did the cranberry stop in the middle of the road? "Because it ran out of juice!"
- What did one pie say to the other pie? "You're crust a little flaky."
- What did the daddy corn say to the baby corn? "Ears looking at you, kid."
- What did one ear of corn say to the other? "You crack me up!"
- Why did the Thanksgiving soup spoon get bad grades? "Because it was always a little 'laddle'!"
- Why did the roll hide under the table? "It wanted to avoid getting torn apart in the "bread" debate!"
- What did one gravy boat say to the other? "Life's gravy!"
- How did the peas feel when they found out everyone preferred mashed potatoes? "They were green with envy."
- Got any cornbread jokes? "I do, but they're corny."
- What side dish requires a plus-one when invited to dinner? "Mac and cheese."
- Why did the comedian ask you to pass the bread? "He was trying to get on a roll."
- What did the dressing say to the turkey? "You ain't seen stuffing yet."
- I tried a new pie recipe. "Wow, you're a real pie-oneer."
- How was the butternut squash soup? "It was gourd."
- Why did the potato apologize? "He mashed up."
- What side dish do you bring for Thanksgiving dinner when you accidentally sat on the sweet potatoes? "Squash casserole."
- What role do green beans play in Thanksgiving dinner? "The casse-role."
- What's Frankenstein's favorite Thanksgiving dish? "Monster mash potatoes and grave-y."
- What's a turkey's favorite dessert? "Peach gobbler!"
- How'd the Thanksgiving cheese plate go over? "Everyone was grateful."
- Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive? "It had 24 carrots."
- What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children? "If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!"
- Why did the cranberries turn red? "Because they saw the turkey dressing."
- You know you overdid it on Thanksgiving when you cut yourself shaving and you bleed gravy."
- My grandma made mashed potatoes from a box. That's it. That's the joke."
Other Thanksgiving Puns
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- What did one autumn leaf say to another? "I'm falling for you."
- What did the mother broom ask the father broom? "Feeling swept off your feet yet?"
- What did the mama turkey say to her misbehaving son? "If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!"
- What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine? "Give me my quarterback!"
- What kind of music did the pilgrims listen to? "Plymouth Rock."
- What do you a call the age of a pilgrim? "Pilgrimage.
- Why didn't the pilgrim want to make the bread? "It's a crummy job."
- If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? "Pilgrims."
- What did pilgrim teenagers think about the first Thanksgiving? "It was corny."
- What's John Wayne's favorite holiday? "Thanksgiving, Pilgrim."
- Why do pilgrims' pants always fall down? "Because they wear their buckles on their hats!
- Why did the football get kicked out of the team? "It was always going flat."
- What did the scarecrow say to the cornfield? "You're a-maize-ing!"
- What did the vegetables say to the gardener? "Lettuce give thanks."
- Why did the farmer win an award? "Because he was out standing in his field."
- Why did the Thanksgiving book get in trouble? "Because its contents included "fowl" language."
- What did the apron say to the oven mitts? "You're too hot to handle."
- Why did the fork give thanks? "Because every meal was a "stabbing" success!"
- What did the fire say to the wood? "You crackle me up!"
- What's the best music to listen to on Thanksgiving? "'Platter-day' hits!"
- What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving? "The turkey trot!"
- Why did the pilgrim wear a belt on his hat? "To keep his "pants" up!"
- What kind of tan did pilgrims get at the beach? "Puritan!"
