Music

The 12 Raunchiest Country Songs

Here’s a list for those who have something risqué on the brain.

Country music is known for the occasional double entendre, but some songs aren’t even trying to be subtle. Recorded by the bad boys of country, these tunes don’t leave a lot of room for interpretation. Sometimes a nuanced courtship just won’t cut it. Here are the raunchiest country songs the genre has to offer.

12. “Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off” – Joe Nichols

 

We all have vulnerabilities to particular liquors, and for Joe Nichols’ lucky lady, it’s tequila. He may feign concern as his gal goes for margaritas with her friends, but we all know what he’ll be thinking once she stumbles home. WE’RE ON TO YOU, JOSEPH.

11. “I’m Just Talkin’ About Tonight” – Toby Keith

 

You can’t blame a guy for being direct. Not everyone who hits the bar scene is looking for a lifelong, whirlwind romance, and Toby Keith is just the guy to not provide one.

10. “You Look Good In My Shirt” – Keith Urban

 

The girl-wearing-a-guy’s-shirt-the-next-morning trick has been employed by every rom com and will-they-won’t-they sitcom ever. So it wasn’t a huge surprise when everyone’s favorite romantic Australian borrowed it for a cut from his 2002 album Golden Road.

9. “Who’s Your Daddy?” – Toby Keith

 

Toby Keith’s catchy 2002 ode to being a sugar daddy reveals the terrible truth that, yes fellas, we’re only after your money!!! The music video ups the stakes with some romantic accidental breaking & entering.

8. “XXL” – Keith Anderson

 

Anderson’s music is closer to blues rock than most country music. “XXL” is basically his version of Bo Diddley’s “I’m A Man”, and though it’s a little ridiculous (like most songs on this list), it’s refreshing to hear some anti-aw shucks braggadocio hit the southern airwaves every once in awhile.

7. “All Over The Road” – Easton Corbin

 

Now, I don’t want to cast aspersions, but there’s something fishy going on in this car. No one is ever so in love that they lose the ability to drive. All I’m sayin’ is, Easton probably deserved to get pulled over.

6. “Pickin’ Wildflowers” – Keith Anderson

 

But of course Keith Anderson’s hit “Pickin’ Wildflowers” would make this list too. No song in the history of time has made flowers sound this sexy. Even the guitar licks are filthy.

5. “Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy” – Big & Rich

 

With a band name like Big & Rich, it would be a wasted opportunity if they never threw some raunch our way. Their hilarious, absurd hit about the modern cowboy is made doubly great by being PETA-friendly. They’re only concerned about animal welfare, you know? It’s touching.

4. “Nothing On But The Radio” – Gary Allan

 

Gary Allan wins the romance award on this list – the people in the song are “Two people meant to be together / Two lovers dreaming of forever.” But it doesn’t make the phrase “nothing on but the radio” any less provocative.

3. “Fish” – Craig Campbell

 

The music video for “Fish” might have you take the lyrics literally, but don’t be fooled. This hit was Craig Campbell’s best bet at pulling one over on the FCC, featuring genius lines like “She always wants to go down by the dam / And I love how she looks with that rod in her hand.”

2. “Honkey Tonk Badonkadonk” – Trace Adkins

 

If 2014 was the Year of the Booty, Trace Adkins was ahead of his time when he released this butt ballad in 2005. Outside country circles, it’s usually heavily ridiculed (same with “She Thinks My Tractor’s Sexy”… what gives, y’all?!). But honestly, it’s too silly to hate. I mean, come on: she got it goin’ on like Donkey Kong.

1. Red Headed Woman – Bruce Springsteen

 

Though not exactly country, Springsteen wrote this lascivious ode to wife Patti Scialfa during one of his periods of roots exploration. Though we can all give The Boss props for being generous, this song leaves little to the imagination.

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