10 Stupidly Complicated Snacks You Will Never Make for Your Kids

We’ve all seen the food art some moms prepare for their kids, and yeah, it’s glorious.

It’s absolutely stunning and probably took hours. I bet these blogging goddesses prepped for weeks to get the exact ripeness of fruit with which to perfect their banana penguins. They probably went out and bought a special rice mat to prepare only the best sandwich sushi. They probably wake up every morning with sunshine pouring into their windows regardless of the season, and sing perfect soprano arias while blue birds serve their children strawberry brioche and crème fraîche.

It might just be my jealousy talking because my kids have never tasted a Ritz spider or a celery snail. Maybe I just wish that I had the coordination and skill to masterly craft an exact replica of Eric Carl’s The Very Hungry Caterpillar out of green apples and strawberries.

But, I think, in reality, we may love these complex works of culinary art, we may pin them, we may share them, we may even text them to one another, but after we do that, we’re going to open up a package of Goldfish and pour our kids a cup of milk. Because, probably, the only time these snacks were ever made was right before the blogging goddesses snapped a picture of them.

But, if you do happen to be one of those women whose chores are all attended by hummingbirds and baby does, here are 10 ridiculously complicated snacks that the rest of us will never make for our poor, deprived children.

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10 Stupidly Complicated Snacks You Will Never Make for Your Kids