You might go to your local farmers market every weekend at 10 am sharp. Or maybe you only go once a year just to say you did it. But these personalities inhabit everyone’s favorite post-brunch weekend activity come rain or shine.
1. The Instagrammers
How many pictures are too many pictures? We may never know the answer to that question. But we do know that Instagrammers like to take selfies. And food pictures. As often as possible.
2. The Regular Who Brings Naturally-Sourced Hemp Bags
She’s prepared, she’s ready to buy and you better not get in her way. He has baskets, bags and a list to match. Watch out excited tourists and Instagrammers, they don’t have time for your nonsense.
3. The Under Cover Chef
The only person more prepared than the hemp bag goddess is the actual chef. They feel and smell the produce and probably know the stall owners. We all wish we could be this savvy when choosing eggplants and melons.
4. The Yoga Addict
You know the one. Yoga pants. Lycra top. Mat slung over the shoulder. A decidedly noticeable topknot. Watch out dark, leafy greens and super foods. She’s coming for your empowering nutrients.
5. The Taste-Tester
He doesn’t know what he wants (and didn’t even bring a bag). Anything and everything is up for grabs with this grazer, from fermented onion juice to hunks of sausage. Don’t expect this one to get out of the market in less than an hour.
6. The Artisanal Hipster
Before the artisanal spoon shops and yarn stores existed, there was a guy with a beard, some suspenders and a little stand hanging out at the local farmers market. He’s probably still there trying to get you to buy fermented yak milk lollipops.
7. The Reluctant Boyfriend
He’s out of place no matter where he stands. Hands in pockets and a look of lost hope give him away immediately. Will he ever leave this place again? Will he ever see his girlfriend again?
8. The Fair-Trade-Everything-Is-Handmade Pop-Up Hippie
Need some shell jewelry? Or a beaded beanie? You’re in the right place. The scent of incense and the tinkling of bells shall call you to the classic hippie stall. Or maybe an impromptu jam session.
9. The Accidental First-Timer
He probably thought he could just walk down an aisle, pick up a cheap Saturday lunch item and go home. The bewildered realization that his sandwich is sold as separate items to be assembled later only hits when he is trapped in the center of it all.
10. The Questioner
Where was the cow raised? How long have you been running your farm? Where can I get a list of ingredients? Will you be back next week? Forget a quick purchase if you get stuck behind this talkative type.